"Sea Kitten" Fetuses: A new name for caviar

PETA, which I think stands for Practitioners of the Esteemed Tradition of Animism, has launched a campaign against the killing (none dare call it murder) of what they call "sea kittens," commonly known to all users of the English language as "fish." The idea is that people won't kill--or at least won't eat--anything called "kittens." Never mind that PETA kills over 90% of the animals it "rescues," including kittens; they recommend that their constituents send the following letter to the head of the Fish and Wildlife Service of the USA.

The Fish and Wildlife Service's promotion of fishing is a glaring contradiction of its mission. Neurobiologists tell us that fish have nervous systems that comprehend and respond to pain, and that, when it comes to the ability to feel pain, fish are just like dogs, cats, and all other animals. Dr. Donald Broom, a scientific advisor to the British government, explains, "The scientific literature is quite clear. Anatomically, physiologically and biologically, the pain system in fish is virtually the same as in birds and mammals." Scientists have created a detailed map of pain receptors in fish's mouths and all over their bodies.

In light of these facts, I urge you to do the right thing by adhering to the FWS' stated mission to protect fish. Stop your department's promotion of fishing! I urge you to instead advocate nonviolent pastimes, such as bird-watching, canoeing, or hiking.

A sidebar on the PETA website informs us that the proper term for caviar is "Baby Sea Kittens."

Somebody needs to tell the folks at PETA that the Supreme Court does not take an interest in protecting fish from their killers until at least the 24th week of gestation. Prior to that, Sea Kitten Fetuses are fair game. And no one gives a rip if they feel pain at any time prior to actual hatching.