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Friday 6 June 2008

How to get the troops out of Iraq

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The military occupation of Iraq has now gone on longer than the allied occupation of postwar Germany, and with considerably more casualties. Understandably, many members of the military would rather not serve there--some having already been through one or two rotations in The Sandbox. Reservists, who sat out the entire Vietnam Conflict, are carrying an enormous share of the load. Even troops in non-combatant roles are being dragged into the fight as they transverse an ever-shifting battlefield.

Well, for those who have had enough, and want to go home, I have good news. There are now two tried and true ways of getting a 1-way ticket on the next plane back to the US. Here they are:

1. Hand a Muslim a token with a Bible verse engraved on it.

2. Use a Qur'an for target practice.

I'm not saying that I recommend either of these actions*, only that I predict they would be very effective in getting anyone who carries them out a quick trip home--and probably a chance to work out his biceps while getting a nice tan at Ft. Leavenworth.

Just think: if every soldier in Iraq were to take just one of these actions, we could have all our troops home in no time.

*In the interests of full disclosure, I have never done either of these, nor do I ever intend to.

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